Organic Gardening...and one last farewell...

My flowers that need care are the little blossoms in my own home and in myself...and those at last in my community whom I am honored to touch in my everyday life also.

On Selective Watering:

"...please, please don't water the seeds of anger, intolerance, irritation, or despair in me. And I promise not to water these seeds in you. I know that you also have negative seeds, and I'll be very careful not to water these seeds in you, because I know if I do, you'll be very unhappy. And then I will suffer also. I vow only to water the positive seeds in you--the seeds of love, compassion, and understanding." Anger, Thich Naht Hanh, pg. 74

"One hour of watering the flower in the other person can make him or her begin to bloom. It is not so difficult to do." Anger, Thich Naht Hanh, pg. 75

On Organic Composting:

"If you don't have garbage, you have nothing to use in order to make compost, you have nothing to nourish the flowers in you. You need the sufferings, the afflictions in you. Since they are organic, you know that you can transform them and make good use of them...you will smile at both the flower and garbage in you, you will embrace both." Anger, Thich Naht Hanh, pg. 69


I am letting go this attachment to focus on my garden...the beautiful souls I have been blessed to share this life with.

If you want to reach me I will always respond to comments I see delivered to my email!

Farewell...and God's richest blessings...............

Ruthie

good bye for now...

Dear Loved Ones

I have to say good bye for now

I have flowers to water

and compost to make

pretty fishy

Here's the jewel discovering our fishy's with the aid of a handy sit n' spin placed a little too close to the aqaurium...yes I held my breath while taking this picture. :)

Thankful Thursday: Candles...

and marshmallows and graham crackers and chocolate. yum.

Thankful Thursday: My Sweetheart

Today my Sophie graduated from kindergarten. Papa took the morning off to attend the festivities. The program was adorable, but it was the sweet moments caught on camera afterwards that I will always remember: Watching Sophie throw her arms around her Papa's neck with such a delighted sparkle in her eye was enough to make time freeze for a moment. It is overwhelmingly obvious that my children are crazy about their Papa...and so am I.

I am so thankful to be married to my favorite person in the whole world.

Kindness Matters

I don't know who she was but her face has been stuck in my head for the past hour now.

A couple weeks ago I vowed that I would never take all of my kids shopping with me at once again. It wasn't that bad of an experience...I mean, we've had worse. But for some reason we seemed to have been quite a sight on our last grocery trip because we got an incredible amount of comments. Comments like "Wow, you are a brave woman," and of course, "Are they all yours?" I have four children and I am often told that I don't look old enough to have four children. I am. Four children does not seem like a huge family to me, I am one of six siblings and my oldest sister has eight. (That does seem like a huge family.) I occasionally get comments on my size. At our yard sale an older lady was looking at a size 4 dress I was given that was just too big for me (it was a big 4). She said, "These are all your children and you can wear a size four? Congratulations!" Thanks for the skinny genes, Dad. Anyway, one of the ladies in the grocery store that day could not seem to get over my little gang. She kept going on and on, talking to others, saying things like, "Geeze, that's not for me." In the check out line when someone again congratulated me for my bravery to bring them all shopping with me, I responded, "You do what you have to do. I wouldn't do it if I didn't have to." Needless to say, by the end of my shopping experience, I was drained and a little bit weary of my kiddos, who really were behaving quite well, considering my non-chipperness. So we got home and I said never again (which I fully knew was an unrealistic declaration).

My point, after the lengthy digression, is this: Kind words make a world of difference. I cannot begin to tell how my life has been altered by people who have taken the time to offer kind words, words of encouragement, words of affirmation. I can still see her face. I was at the grocery store today with the whole gang, bagging my groceries, dealing with hungry, tired children, in the most compassionately firm way possibly while bagging groceries and holding a wiggly 10 month old at the same time. She came right up to me and looked me in the eyes. She said, "You deserve great appreciation." That's all. I stopped, a little stunned. I said, "Thank you." I wish I had said much more, but really, I was a bit overwhelmed at a complete stranger offering so rich and sincere word of kindness to me that for a moment I was at a loss. Then she was gone. I hope I see her again. I would tell her how much her simple act of kindness meant to me and how I will remind myself again to be aware of others around me and to offer myself in that same way...even if it's just a kind or encouraging word.

My life has been affected again and again by thoughtful strangers and aquaintances who have taken the time to compliment or encourage me as a mother. We all need affirmation, to know we're doing a good job, to know it's going to be okay, to know we're not alone. When something like this happens in my life it makes me realize once again that I am a part of something much bigger.

What if we all took the time to be aware of the needs of others around us (at home and away) and learned to be liberal with kindness?

Pixies

By the way, there really are fairies in our garden:

And jewels:

Those Beautiful Curly Blonde Locks...

Yesterday morning I walked into the bathroom upstairs and noticed a few locks of beautiful curly blonde hair. For a moment I was puzzled, then slowly panic set in as I realized what little head the tufts had fallen from. In a daze, I found myself in the girls room surrounded by more angel hair. Sarah is my three-year-old. Everywhere we go people ooh and ahh over her sweet blonde curls. Admittedly, I have a hard time taking my eyes off those darling ringlets, myself.

I pulled her into my arms from a sound sleep and saw a first glimpse of the damage done. Yes, it was true, she had cut her hair quietly before going to sleep, not knowing the repercussions of her actions. In tears, I said, "Sarah, what did you do to your beautiful curls?" Still half asleep, her face crinkled up and tears swelled. Of course, I went through the stages of bewildered, sad, then angry....lastly humbled. Hair grows back, but heart's are easily broken...remorse was deep and real for her and for me.

Sarah now sports a darling vintage 80's hairstlye perfect for warm summer weather. It will take a while to get used to and I've vowed to put her in summer dresses and girly colors all summer while her hair grows out, but I have to admit...it suits her personality.
This is Sarah with her best friend, Bella...doesn't she look like she just stepped out of an 80's McCall's magazine?

Germinating

Spring has pulled me outside. It has lulled me away from my books, my paper and even my computer...yes. I don't regret it, but last night I was beginning to feel a little sensory overload...too much noice, too much touch, too much busy....too little shhhh, too little deep breathes, too little deep thought and free writing. When I get too busy I tend to neglect the little shoots pushing through the soil like this year's new peonies...reminding me they were there under the surface the whole time. I was too busy enjoying the new digging, the new planting...the anticipation of new things. Then the old pushed through. I would have initially compared this old stuff to weeds needing to be pulled...because we all have some of that in our lives. But after a moment's reflection I quickly, sharply realized that these underlying feelings that keep resurfacing, in spite of the pain they cause me, in spite of my first inclination to pull them like invading weeds, with patience and quiet inner work will bring a beautiful, fragrant blossom to my life. I will let my heart expand and love big...and love truly. I will learn to be truly here for my dear ones. I will open fully and vibrant like the peonies I now anticipate with joy in my garden. I will embrace that which must grow. This is my life, my moment is now....and now...and now...."dwelling in this moment, it is a wonderful moment"....it is the only moment.

Thankful a Few Days After Thursday: Spring Cleaning!

Spring Cleaning has had me distracted this week. Something about this weather turns me into a ball of energy and determination. I get this overwhelming desire to declutter and clean...to make wide open spaces in my home, to open windows and let the fresh air in. I have a lot to say about this practice because it's such a refreshing time for me.

Our basement seems to become a disaster every winter...it starts around October when I go on my Fall decluttering rampage, culling out the children's old toys, getting ready for the Christmas overflow. My intention is to make a few trips to a few local donation spots or to save up for a Spring yard sale. I'm usually a good one for hauling loads over to Goodwill but this year it just didn't happen, so yard sale it is! Anyway, I digress....cleaning out the basement.
Another Winter phenomenon for us is mice...we have been searching for a few weeks among the mountains of clutter near my husband's computer stuff for the mysterious cause of a terrible odor. Well, Tuesday I hauled 5 huge rolls of insulation up to the attic to make space in the basement for organizing the keeping stuff. Let's just say, dead mice: zero; crazy Spring-cleaning lady: 3; foul odor: eliminated. Pow!

I sweep my floors barefooted...it's practical and nostalgic for me. A close friend of mine once shared her secret of sweeping barefooted to assure all the crumbs made it out from under foot. Youthful memories of our friendship always surface when I sweep. I haven't seen her in years and only talk with her on the phone occasionally, but after all my sweeping yesterday, she made an appearance in my dream last night. I don't usually remember my dreams, but I was glad to remember this one. :)

Wednesday and Thursday were my Rearrange The Furniture And Make A Bigger Mess Before The House Looks Great Day. Which by the way, brought to memory these words I wrote in a letter to another old friend, which ring out so true in my life right now, "You can't de-clutter a room without making a big mess first. So don't be fooled if things look really good on the outside. On the inside it's still a big sloppy mess...but it's my big sloppy mess and little by little the clutter is clearing and my room is expanding." Hmmmn...deep inhale...okay exhale. Feels good, huh?

And....thank you to another sweet, sweet friend who came to my door with a box of Bigelow Vanilla Almond Tea. I am savoring a cupful this morning before going on a golf-outing with my husband...my first time on a golf course without castles and windmills...should be interesting.
Today is my sweetheart's birthday, so he's teaching me to golf! And thank you to Grandma who makes it all possible!